E D

What does ED mean to you?

Is it a name, as in a horse? or short for Edward?

Is it EDucation?

Is it something you put after your name after you have your doctorial education or Masters degree in education?

My new friend, Mr. Turnaround
has this great answer for why things didn't go well
in his marriage
or have trouble with other people
and since he works with special ed students
he thinks these "problem" people
are
ED.

Now he didn't explain to me his definition of this
prescription or description of others
because I am also in education
so he
assumed I knew what he meant

and in my book
ED is Emotionally Disturbed

Oh Fuck,

I am ED

so I told him
I am ED

and of course he asked me why I said it

because I am

in my book we all are
to some degree

I mean

come on
I like to know when I am going to see him again

My emotions are a roller coaster
or in most minds

I am moody

but hey
at least I seem alive
and not a zombie
who has no personality
and I am
not so
ED
that I am off the charts
and need a padded room
(although, many days I wish I had one)

so

once again
he left
with no hint at when I would see him again

and I sat here
getting more pissed off
by the minute

I mean
this man showed up at my door on Friday night who didn't care if we went somewhere or sat here.
then he had a bright idea to go to the liquor store and buy stuff to make margaritas and I said ok, let's go... (ummm take note, I don't drink tequila, and he did already know this about me)
so we did
and came back with all the stuff
and stood in my kitchen and mixed them
I drank them anyway
and they were actually good
but I knew I would pay for it
and boy did I
but not in the way I thought I would

He drank way too much in a very short time (3 hours)
and the next thing I know, I am standing over him
outside
as he lost his cookies all over my front yard
in front of my neighbors
If he had long hair, I would have been holding it back
for him
then (30 + minutes later)
sat with him on the couch as he crouched over
with his elbows on his knees and his head on his arms
He was too dizzy to sit up,
much less sit up
so with wet cloth in hand
to cool him off
I am sat and and held and cooled him off for 2+ hours
and then we turned and I held him on the couch until I fell asleep and woke up at 3 am and made him
go upstairs and lay down so I could at least sleep
I mean, he wasn't driving home
he barely made it up the stairs

he slept it off
got up to go watch a football game his son was playing in
and got queazy when he drank some water and took some Tylenol.

It was not a fun evening.
He did, at least come come back
and eat lunch and talk to me a bit
but then left
just as much of an enigma
as usual
and I didn't take it well.

and then I wonder
why?

why do I care?
I am still trying to figure that out....

positive thinking? We are both trying to sabottage something that could be really great.... and he isn't much of a drinker.... as Walker would say "Goodie, more for me".