Muse has commented of late
that I am not posting about Tater...
well, no, I am not...
he asked me not to,
but in the spirit
of using this as an outlet
here we go
what do you do
when someone you really care about
and profess to love
(as if that is really possible for me)
does something
or many things in public
that make you cringe?
Maybe they are sarcastic
to the bartender
(your favorite bartender)
in your favorite hang out
asking questions
about the other guys that have been there
with you
What do you do when
they show open jealousy
but swear that is not what it is?
Maybe they don't like your male friends
and when they find out
you have plans with them
they make sure they are available
to see you then
so you will change your plans
What do you do
when they witheld affection
or kanoodling
and when you ask what is wrong
they say they have been thinking...
and when you say
in a questioning voice
"about breaking up"?
because let's face it
we know we are about to get
hit upside the head
on our blind side
where we weren't expecting anything
bad to happen at this point...
What do you do
when you feel like he needs
constant prodding
and reassurance
of what a great guy he is?
(and really, besides the above,
he is beyond great)
I don't know what to do
I don't want to be a hermit
and not hang out in fun places
or never see my friends in person
on the other hand,
just so he doesn't sound as bad
as I made him out to be
he pays great compliments
he shows great attention
when he is with me
he surprises me with lunch sometimes
he calls all the time
he sends uplifting and loving emails
we have great conversations
we are great friends and lovers
but the jealousy and
seemingly low self-esteem
man, how do you deal with that?
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5 comments:
You can't have it all.
Its something you have to expect when you frequent the same haunts you went to when you were seeing other guys.
Some of those questions you could probably ask yourself to, it is after all a two way street.
Time should set minds at ease
Do you know why scrunchy is such a perfect analogylike a scru? A scruncy gets tighter and tighter around your hair to the point of making your head ache-those little/big things just get more and more annoying until you can't ignore them.
These are not simple issues-a man who is insecure and jealous even though you have given him no other reason that having a life before him? These are underlying issues for him...not you. But when you begin to feel isolated or cut off because you don't want to rock the boat...then it becomes your problem.
It is hard to thrive under this umbrella. No matter how much you try you won't be able to keep those insecurity drops from slipping under your umbrella.
Walker, The only other person he really knows I have been there with is RJ and he knows we are just friends. He was jealous of the bartender too, because he knew what drink to make for me, not because I am a regular, but because I have given him a hard time about how it should have an umbrella in it. I agree that time should set minds at ease, unless...
Muse, yes, I have seen what it is like with friends who stand under that umbrella... and no, I don't want to... just a bit leary, maybe it will pass, and maybe it won't... RJ seems to think it won't.
If he is that jeolous then he has trust issues and he better deal with them now before you find yourself a prisoner in your own life.
Ooooh, Well said Walker!
See what happens when you put taters on the table?
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