Gritting My Teeth

I am Stressed

I am stressed at work
trying to help youngsters
get ready to be promoted
to the next grade level

I am stressed at work
dealing with
The Bitches across the hall
as little as I talk to them
and as much as I ignore them
it is still stressful
in meetings
and as we "collaborate"
to put on a show
in front of the masses

I am stressed in heartfelt ways
One reason I can't discuss
but can relate

Mr. Jones told me
that V-Day is difficult
for him because a woman
he was very much in love with
was born on that day
and he met her on her birthday
and he doesn't want to remember
or let it bother him
but it sneaks in
and it does interfere

We all have experiences
both good and bad
that make imprints on our lives
and one of the ones I am experiencing
right now
is that sometimes
it is nicer knowing
that if you wanted to find someone
you know where they are
but when they are no longer there
you feel as if you have lost them forever

that really bothers me

I am stressed by my family

My youngest son decided
at the tender age
of 17
that he would move out
of his father's house
and into an apt. with a friend

He didn't tell me
his father did
who, if you have read previous posts
didn't put up a fight
he just let him go.

I tried to call my son on V-Day
and left him a message
when he didn't answer
but he hasn't called me back.

He has called my mother
who is taking him to eat and shop
this afternoon.
But she did learn
when she asked where to pick him up
that he is back at his dad's house.
But no one has called to tell me that
except my mother as soon as she heard it.

I am stressed about my apt.
I have too much stuff
I am trying to weed through it
and get rid of some
but things I do have
are very sentimental
and that makes it hard
to let some things go.

Time to work on it
is an issue as well
because I am spending so much time on work
of late.

so ....
when I am stressed
I grit my teeth
awake and asleep
I have had a night guard for my mouth
for awhile
and I use it
but my jaw is still sore
and I catch myself holding in
the stress
in my jaw and my shoulders
and other places as well

A really good clue for those around me
to know when I am
beyond
and want to call Calgon
to take me away
is my use of a common slang word

FUCK

it is every other word
and the other day I read a post
on Beyond the Crossroads (see sidebar)
and this is an excerpt from that post
that was titled Fridays and F's

but it certainly true for me
and gives all examples of how I use
the F word while in this state

so here it is... enjoy


Did you know Fuck is one of the most interesting words in the English language today? Out of all the English words that begin with the letter ‘F’ …fuck is the only word referred to as ‘the F word… It’s the one magical word. Just by its sound can describe pain, pleasure, hate and love. Fuck, as most words in the English language is derived from German …the word fuieken, which means to strike.
In English, fuck falls into many grammatical categories:As a transitive verb for instance …Carl fucked me.As an intransitive verb…Carl fucks.
Its meaning is not always sexual, it can be used as..An adjective such as …I’m doing all the fucking work.As part of an adverb …I talk too fucking much.As an adverb enhancing an adjective …I am fucking beautiful…..Yeah right.As a noun …I don’t give a fuck.As part of a word …absofuckinglutely -or- infuckingcredible.And as almost every word in a sentence …Fuck the fucking fuckers.
As you must realize, there aren’t too many words with the versatility of fuck…such as these examples show:Fraud …I got fucked at the used car lot.Dismay …ahhh fuck it.Trouble …I guess I’m really fucked now.Aggression …Don’t fuck with me buddy.Difficulty …I don’t understand this fucking question.Inquiry …Who the fuck was that?Dissatisfaction …I don’t like what the fuck is going on here.Incompetence …He’s a fuck-off.Dismissal …Why don’t you go outside and play hide and go fuck yourself…
With all these multi-purpose applications, how can anyone be offended when you use the word. Use this unique, flexible word more often in your daily speech.It will identify the quality of your character immediately.Say it loudly and proudly…FUCK YOU!
So to recount FUCK here.
1. The universally recognized “F word”2. N. Implying complete and utter confusion3. N. a really stupid person4. V. To procreate5. adj. Can be used to modify any word for more passion6. Int. Expresses disgust7. Int. Expresses complete surprise and joy8. adv. Can be used to make a command more urgent
1. I do not accept the “F word” as your name2. What in the fuck?3. You stupid fuck!4. I suggest we go fuck in the bed while eating crackers and petting a cat name Smoltz!5. This fucking guy was so fucking weird. He asked me if I was fucking insane.6. Aw, FUCK!!7. Holy fuck! You guys rock!8. Just fucking jump before I fucking kick you in the balls!
And a little historical significance.Adam to Eve: Wanna fuck?General Custer: Have you ever seen so many fucking Indians?!?Captain of the Titanic: Where’s all this fucking water coming from?Mayor of Hiroshima: What the FUCK was that?!?Todd Beamer: Fuck these assholes. Let’s roll.
Fornicating Under Consensual Knowledge a.k.a FUCK (caps) or fuck (lowercase for those lazy bastards who can’t hold the shift key).
Person 1: Do you FUCK?Person 2: Why yes, I do FUCK.Person 1: FUCK is sooo good!Person 2: Yup, FUCK sure is. Person 1: I am FUCKing right now….Person 2: Oh indeed.
Acronym for:First United Church of KenyaFornicate Under Crown/Consent of KingFirst Upper Cut Kill
Also the act of having sex.The adjective used in any sentence to make you sound more serious.An extremely overused word.
He fucked me at the F.U.C.K.I got the paper to F.U.C.K. so now we can have sexI’m not fucking kidding. I just told the fucking fuck to fuck off.

Oh Fuck just use your imagination…..