A Trip Down Memory Lane

Today has been a strange day

It had me thinking

of things that might have been

but weren't

I was sad most of the day

and my mood has been blue

for a few days now....

so as I drove home,

I was thinking of one of the greatest loves of my life

and I stopped in a spot where we first spent a good amount of time together

I thought about ordering
"the usual"

and then realized

that even though

the tried and true "usual"
would be good

it is time for a change

so I ordered the "new"
item on the menu

brought it home and
ate it and reminisced

The first great love of my life
Paul W.

I was working at a
Schlotsky's Sandwich Shop
in Amarillo Texas.

He was working at one of the other
Schlotsky's in town
and the shop I worked at
was the one where all the
baking of the buns
for all the stores was done.

So at the end of the day
the other stores called and gave
a "bun count"
so the baker would know
how many buns to bake

Paul is the one who would call
from his shop
and I talked to him daily
I hadn't met him
and I had worked there for 2-3 months

Everyone kept telling me
that we would be dating if we met

and everyone at his shop said the same thing

then it happened
we had a chance to meet
and it was pretty much
a done deal

I lost my virginity to him
I loved him
and really thought we would always be together

but we weren't

He broke up with me
on my 18th birthday

That really sucked...
and an omen of what was to come

so today
I stopped and got
an "Italiano" sandwich
rather than an "original"
with BBQ chips and tea

and I thought of Paul
and others

and knew,

that as the pain that took me 3 years
to recover from

is similar to recent pain
that is months old
and I am hoping not to take
one year, much less 3 to recover from

but now,
now my thoughts of Paul
are fond
and I smiled as I reminisced
about our time
at work
and with each other
in bed and out

I don't fall in love easily
but when I do
I fall hard

so here I am, pulling myself up
off the floor
from falling on my face

but I know
I will overcome
and great things will come to me

because I have before

and I will again...

sometimes it is ok to take a trip

down Memory Lane...