Men Behaving Badly

After a long and exciting week
and a great date on Halloween
my mind pondered whether I should
get up very early Saturday
and join RJ and family
on a 5K run
for a good cause
I decide I should
it would do me good
and I could come home afterwards
and sleep.

So I set my alarm
and I look at the picture of the big game hunter
and I call to see if he is home yet
and he is on his way
but not there yet
he says he will call on Saturday
which creates a smile on my face
and his
so we say goodnight,
I roll over and fall asleep
a little while later
I wake up and look at the clock
6:45 glares back at me
WHAT? the alarm was set for 6
the race starts at 8 across town
so picking up the phone and dialing RJ
"Have you left yet?" I ponder
when he answers
"No, we are right now" he retorts
"Where are you?"

I respond with
"My alarm didn't go off,
and I just woke up. So, do you think
I should get up and rush over there
or just go back to sleep?"

"Go back to sleep, you don't have time
to get there before it starts. By the way
how was your date last night?"

A huge grin finds its way on my face
"Great! Just Great!"

"Well go back to sleep, you can tell me
all about it later..."
as I set the phone down
on the bedside table
I decide to roll over
and doze a while...
A little while later
I slowly wake up
and glance over at the clock
while my mind thinks about all
I have to do today
an afternoon with a friend
at the Day of the Dead celebration
a ball game to watch tonight
school papers to grade
plans to write
and the clock glares at me 8:07
rolling out of bed
grabbing my robe
feet shuffling toward the kitchen
pouring the last
of the Mocha Java
into the filter
and pouring the water
into the reservoir
thoughts of my previous evening
enter my mind
he sensed I wasn't trusting
he asked me to trust him
and we practiced a trust exercise
and he was trustworthy
he asked about why
I would not distrust him
and I explained
that previous encounters
had formed behaviors
that are hard to break.
He was very understanding
While the coffee was brewing
I retrieved the newspaper from
the front porch
and a blanket from the bedroom
having poured my first cup of coffee
I retreated to the patio
sitting in the big chair
and situated myself under the cover
ready to enjoy both the
Friday daily paper
and the Saturday daily paper
and my cell phone rings
focusing on the display
finding it is not a number I know
but it is local
I wonder if it is a parent of a child
so I answer
it is TATER
pushing me
to take him back
to give us a try
and I try
politely to explain
that I am not willing to turn back
and give the relationship another try
and he asks why
and I don't want to say
so I just say I can't
and he continues to push the matter
for 35 MINUTES
until I have had enough
so I tell him that I have to go
that I was trying to read the paper
and enjoy my morning
and I have now been talking to him
for over 35 minutes
and he says goodbye abruptly and hangs up
WHEW
relief flows over me
I sit and regain my composure
and ponder the papers
wishing I had read Fridays before
my date on Friday
upon finding my coffee cold
and nearly gone,
I return to the kitchen and
pour another cup
and about 40 minutes later
I decide it is time to get ready
for my lunch with a friend
so I walk in
she calls
we make a plan to meet at 11
and shop at the Farmer's Market
together, eat lunch
and then I am going to the
Day of the Dead celebration alone
she has a paper to write for her masters program
as I hang up the phone
I hear some clattering sounds
out the front window
so I look out
and what do I see
but TATER
unloading boxes
and stacking them outside my condo
He was storing my school boxes and
some other items from when I moved
that I didn't have room for at the time
and even though we had quit seeing each other
he promised he would keep them for me
til the new year
and not ever leave them sitting outside
apparently he didn't like my decision
and chose to deliver them to me
I walked outside
and he wouldn't speak
so I started bringing boxes in
I thought I had retrieved them all
and stopped and returned
to get ready for lunch
and here he comes again
this time he carried things inside too
and I so did not want him in the house
but I didn't want to make a scene either
so I dressed for my lunch
made sure no boxes were behind my vehicle
and told him that if there were more
to put them in my parking place,
and I left.
While at lunch, he called
and I didn't answer
I had a minute before I went home
and I listened to the voicemail
long and lengthy
but basically
he didn't want to leave things out
while I wasn't home
so he packed them all up
in his van
and would return later in the day
or sunday
he didn't return Saturday
because I said I wouldn't be home
he did bring them Sunday
and I was working to put away
the ones from the day before
He rang the bell
I walked to the door
he wanted to come in
and I told him to put them in my parking place
he asked where my car was
and I said
not here
He unloaded
he paused out of sight
he walked to the door
and wanted to give me something
I told him to just leave it on the mat
he said he wanted to have a 5 minute conversation
I said there was nothing left to say
He said he wanted to tell me some things
about me
I said I knew enough about me
I didn't need to hear what he had to say
and asked if he had unloaded everything
and he said he had
I thanked him for delivering my things to me

and he walked away

now he has called my friends
concerned about me

and all day Saturday
the big game hunter did not call
how do you make sure you don't trade one bad man for another?